2020 is, as we all know, is going down in history with a loud bang gusto in lousy reputation of some sorts.
I am going through my year, and despite this callous time globally, I am grateful every day that it isn’t 2019 any more because that year was majorly painful in my arse. From there, I had changed my course to something unprecedented. And everything boils down to my bravery.
Life cannot be all smooth-sailing. There’s always a submarine ready to attack you with heat-seeking missiles. And then, you have this fraction of a second decision whether to abandon ship or attack back. For some reason, I always attack back. I muster my every kilojoule I have to push through. I do not know how I can do this. Still, somehow, I know I have to because I do not want to miss an opportunity to see the answer as to why something happened to me – which my Dad told me a few months before he passed that question has three results:
- You’ll know soon enough.
- You’ll know somehow someday, it may take years, but that will emerge.
- You’ll never know.
My personality will always quash the 3rd one because that would not give me a better-defined reflection. I am in charge of what I can control, and I will forever treasure that privilege.
So, regardless of this horrible pandemic, economic instability and political unravelling globally – I am finding sanity. Here I am, relentlessly reflective of everything and doing something about it. I cannot change the course of the world, but as an individual, I am doing what I can to stay healthy – mind, body and soul.
This topic just emerged because I just got a light-hearted message from a friend from Singapore stating that he’s “impressed and in awe” that I am putting my poems out there soon. It was nice to hear feedback like this from time to time as to inspire. This message and path are extra to internalisation of my life lessons and extending it back to the world. Reminders are always appreciated – especially that this self-publishing gig is scary AF. This entire industry is highly complex, and starting from scratch is daunting. I’d instead work with innovation, science and technology advancements without a hint of doubt, but publishing is a different kind of a hairy beast. I also wonder how I am beginning to come as far as I have, and yet I award it to my bravery to open myself up to a pivot. I just have to try, and here we are.
As to end this post, I just wanted to express that everything is a struggle minus one plus 100. The critical part is your decision on how to handle such odds. Do you want to know? Or never?
I’d say, please discover and know. It’ll be all right. Here’s your war helmet. Go.